💌 Style Mail: 3 style mantras for the world we live in

One thing that I don't like & three things that I do

I’ve said it before & I’ll say it again - I don’t like new year’s resolutions (here’s the last time I said it). But what I do like are intentions. Because resolutions feel like hard & fast rules that you have to follow. While intentions feel like ideas that will shape your behavior - and I appreciate the gentler approach.

I also prefer to think of spring (we’re almost there!) as the start of the new year - or at least the ‘style new year’. Because the middle of winter seems like the crappiest time for new beginnings - but spring feels just right.

So, I’ve come up with 3 intentions (or mantras) to influence not only your style, but how you buy, wear & care for your clothes this year. I wanted to create something simple that could encompass overall intention & mindfulness about your wardrobe. Because, especially right now, we all want to be more mindful about what’s in our closet & how we choose to add to it.

I introduced this idea in a recent Instagram reel - but I thought it deserved a bigger explanation & more details, so here you go…

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✍️ Style Scoop

BUY YOUR CLOTHES LIKE YOU BUY FURNITURE

You know how you see at $10 t-shirt & think, “it’s cheap, I’ll just get it”? Or, “it’s on sale, I can’t pass it up”? (Don’t worry, we’ve all done it.) But that can be why it feels like you have too many clothes. Or you have a hard time creating outfits. Or your closet is full - but it still feels like you have nothing to wear.

Because you’re not being intentional with your purchases. And you’re not buying clothes with the same consideration that you’d buy furniture. If you’re thinking, “huh?” - hear me out.

When you’re buying a couch, you probably do some research. You look around for a store that aligns with your style & budget. You take measurements to ensure it will fit in the room. You choose a color/print that works with the rest of the decor. You go for the best quality you can afford. You make sure it’s comfortable.

And it can be the same idea when you’re buying clothes. No, not every clothing purchase needs to equate to a big piece of furniture (like a couch). But how about buying a new jacket with the same intention as you’d buy a lamp? Or selecting a pair of jeans the same way you’d choose a side table? Ask yourself: will it work with what I already have? does it fit right? does it function for my day-to-day life? do I love it enough to wear it over & over? if it’s replacing something, what am I doing with the old one?

Even pausing to think just for a minute before you click <add to cart> (the same way you’d pause before you buy a new chair) can result in much more deliberate decisions.

PICK YOUR OUTFITS LIKE EVERY DAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY

You know how special your birthday can feel? And how you carefully pick what you’re wearing? How about channeling that energy every day?

And again, if you’re thinking, “huh?” - here’s what I mean. On your birthday, you deliberately select an outfit that makes you feel good. So, give yourself the time & space to choose things that make you feel that way all the time. Figure out what brings you joy, figure out what lights you up - and then figure out how to make that happen as often as possible (and if you’re not sure what makes you feel great, here’s an exercise I give to my clients).

And create the environment that allows you to make purposeful choices. For example - instead of just hoping for the best outfit that you can come up with in the morning, pick your outfit the night before. If you’re not sure how your jacket feels over your top, try them on before you’re about to leave the house. Decide which shoes work with your wide leg pants in advance.

In general - if you really want to enjoy your outfits, put in some time, energy & effort (just like you would for your birthday). The investment pays off in loving what you’re wearing - and that can effect everything you do.

Because remember - your birthday is about celebrating you. And you’re worth celebrating every single day.

CARE FOR YOUR CLOTHES LIKE THEY’RE THE ONLY ONES YOU’LL HAVE FOR YEARS

I spend a decent amount of time talking to my clients about clothing care. Because caring for your clothes is honoring the investment (money & time) that you’ve made. It’s good for you, it’s good for your wallet & it’s good for the planet.

But I often encounter people who aren’t caring for their clothes (or aren’t caring for them in a way that will extend their life). Because when clothes are so easy to get (via online shopping or big box stores) - and replacements are just as easy - we tend to value them less. Which can result in not caring for them appropriately.

Think about it: the jacket that you saw on the website & then drove to the store to try on & then brought home & created a few outfits with - you’ll value that more, so you’ll probably take care of it better. But the jacket that you threw into your online cart (with a bunch of other stuff) & then showed up on your doorstep a day later may feel less special - so you might not take care of it as well.

But what if you treated everything in your closet like they were deliberate, well-thought out purchases (regardless of how much they cost or how effort went into getting them)? It could be an impactful mindset shift. And it can be a simple as hanging up your clothes at the end of the day. And choosing to hang-dry (instead of the dryer). And treating stains as soon as they happen.

Which of these 3 style intentions resonates with you the most? Do you agree with them? Leave a comment & let me know your thoughts!

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🕶️ Style Tip

Are you looking to shop with more intention? One way to be more intentional with your spending is to shop at brands & stores that align with your values (like avoiding Amazon because they scaled back their DEI initiatives).

And speaking of Amazon, there’s a week-long boycott going on right now. If you didn’t know, that’s totally ok - because a great benefit of the boycotts is discovering alternatives to the big stores & brands. So, you’re not just shifting your shopping behavior for a week - you’re changing where you shop going forward.

Here are Instagram posts with details on the current Amazon boycott & a timeline of economic blackouts/boycotts coming up. And if you want to wean yourself off Amazon long term, here’s how to break up with Amazon from Emily in Your Phone.

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💡 Client Spotlight

A few outfits for Emma, a virtual client

My client, ‘Emma’, was going through a few transitions. She’s the mom of a 4 year old & was heading back to work full-time. She was shifting from wearing a uniform to work to dressing business casual. Her body had changed, her priorities had changed & she was overwhelmed with the idea of figuring out what to wear for her new work role.

And most of this is so common among my clients - changes in size, changes in priorities, changes in work responsibilities/environment, etc. But Emma was dealing with something that’s less common (but I still see a lot) - shifting from wearing a uniform to actually ‘getting dressed’ for work.

I see a couple of common challenges with clients like this. First, they haven’t built a solid wardrobe foundation - typically they have super casual running-around clothes & then cute going-out clothes, but nothing in between. Second, they aren’t used to flexing their style muscles on a regular basis. So, getting dressed everyday can seem like an insurmountable task.

I’m glad to say that we built Emma a user-friendly, functional & fun wardrobe. And I created outfits for her that transition from casual weekend to business casual work to family nights & going out with friends.

Here are a few things Emma had to say after we finished my framework:

“I no longer stress over what to put on in the mornings. I feel comfortable in the outfits. The outfits are versatile - he taught me how to add a third piece as the weather transitions… & how to dress up an outfit or tailor it for work with accessories.”

“I am amazed how easy he made the process feel on my side of the coast & also really impressed because I can see how he has perfected the process with carefully laid-out steps & thoughtful details.”

I’ll be sharing similarly casual outfits in the VIP newsletter coming out next week! Upgrade to my paid Style Mail VIP subscription to get 30+ outfit ideas a month (from my client styling sessions), exclusive chat access, monthly style challenges & more!

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Let’s Work Together!